constant movement

I had hoped that coming to Japan would help me let go of the things that worry me back home, yet I'm holding on to them, electronically. I know that my computer is a fantastic resource for me, but I also know that it makes people feel a lot closer than they are and that can be a bad thing. I find myself too often concerned with what is going on in the States, which is not where my mind should be. I would like to believe that I am capable of living each day in the moment and of being fully present in where I am and no where else, but at the same time, I tend to carry around a constant concern for the future.

Yet I was thinking a great deal today, perhaps later than it really counted, but at least I have now done the thinking. I realize that I am on a journey and I will continue growing, but that tomorrow doesn't have to be a huge turning point and that no one thing, no matter how much I have my heart set on it, will prevent me from continuing to grow and develop into a more fully capable human being in all capacities of the term. Yes, there are things that could speed me along the way, but I have to remember that opportunities present themselves at the right time. I cannot know whether or not I am spiritually, mentally, emotionally, and physically ready for the opportunities that my heart is set on. Of course, I value them for a legitimate reason, and there is no doubt that these dreams have played and will continue to play a role in my life, yet I do not know when I will be ready for these dreams to be realized. I do know that nothing will go "wrong" since what we perceive as setbacks are simply road signs leading us in the proper direction, even if I don't get what I want. Our desires and our path often split in opposite directions.

Yet as Bryan says, the mind creates our reality. I have confidence in myself. I have confidence in my dreams, and I really do believe that what I "want" is equivalent to taking the next step along my path. It is nice to have an idea of where I am headed without knowing where it will take me, but for now, I cannot think of the might be's, I have to worry about this moment, which is in today and extends not far past my palms. Perhaps it does extend to the keys on this keyboard which plunk away, ever faithful, even when I know not what words to give them.