Full

I have cooked twice today and eaten three full meals without leaving my room. That’s an accomplishment. I made bacon and a bagel this morning, ate leftover sushi for lunch, and cooked dumplings tonight. The dumplings were definitely the most challenging, because I couldn’t read the instructions, so at first I added too much water to the bottom of the pan and then I didn’t have the temperature hot enough to brown the bottoms. I finally got them done and allowed them to simmer in some soy sauce for a while. They were delicious and filling and I really enjoyed them a lot. Plus, I made a baked sweet potato to go with them, and had a tangerine as a side dish/ dessert. It was probably the most complex meal I think I have ever cooked myself, but it was really good, and I was really that I managed to feed myself without help from anyone else. I got all of my work done today, including my learning plan, which I will post after a series of revisions so that you guys can see what it is that I’m trying to accomplish this semester.

I also wrote my thesis statement for Behind the Mask. I am doing a study of women’s issues here in Japan in order to determine whether or not women should be counted as a minority group. I think it will be really exciting. If you have any sources that you think would contribute to my study, please reply and let me know where I can find them.

I also slept for several hours today. I am worried that I am maybe getting sick, since I also slept through a large part of my birthday. Either that, or I am being so productive that a nap is in order every once in a while. I still have a lot that I want to get the ball rolling on, but I feel like I’m on my way. I have noticed that now that I have food to eat, I’ve been eating pretty constantly. I don’t think it’s ever because I am really hungry, but I do always long for food. I haven’t figured out how to stop it, and I’m worried that it might become a problem since I am not as active here as I would be at home. I am looking at taking Tai Chi once a week, which would help, but it is not the aerobic workout that dance can be, or going to the gym with Bryan.

I started meditating today using Full Catastrophe Living by Jon Kabat-Zinn, which my therapist at W&M thought would be a good tool for me to use while here in Japan. I am hoping she’s right. I thought a lot this weekend about going off of my medicine while I am here in Japan. I am not sure that it’s worth the risk, but I also know that the environment I am in is very productive for learning how to cope with oneself. It’s very positive and supportive, and I know that I would have help no matter what decision I make. A lot of learning to take care of myself is going to be practicing my awareness techniques, something that I am trying to do both through my reading and through Tai Chi. Learning to be aware of the reactions taking place within yourself allows you to more fully control what is going on inside yourself, so that you can determine what type of reaction you want to have to whatever stressors you are trying to face.

I am trying to stay on top of everything here. This is my first week in which I actually have a day of not having class. I am looking forward to being able to use Monday night and Tuesday to get a lot of things done for myself that I have not had the time to do so far.

Music of the day: Jimi Hendrix- Fire, Rainer Maria- Ceremony, Rufus Wainwright- In My Arms
Food: sushi, dumplings, and sweet potato
Meditation/ inspiration/ thought of the day: mental health
What I learned: how to cook dumplings. Also, the Ainu (a Japanese minority group) are the only people the Japanese have ever fought on their own soil, and when the Ainu traded with the individuals from “mainland” Japan, they were being given sake (rice wine) that was half poisonous.
Priority: buying fabric softener so that I can do my laundry (still).